Friday, 20 January 2017

The worst night of my life.

It was a nice evening I had just gone to a amusement park I was happy. But I should've known that my mood wouldn't last long. So I was eating dinner with my family when the news channel was blowing up.
“Stay in a low ground area because there is a tornado headed for us!” The news reporter blurted.
“Quick let's go.”my dad commanded.
        We took extra water bottles and fruit snacks because that was all we had. So we took all of our mattresses downstairs in the basement. We stayed there until.
The weather started to change and as the weather changed they ran inside a room and called, “hurry Micheal!” I ran into the room fotunatley we made it alive but I fainted when I got into the room.
“Look, look we made yesss!”I celebrated.

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5 comments:

  1. 100wcbyfread.com20 January 2017 at 16:27

    Nice story, but check these thing

    -in you first sentence you should put /an/ in front of the word /amusement/.
    - your tittle should be /The worst Night Of My Life/
    instead of /The worst night of my life/ because the first letter of every word in the tittle should be capital.
    - In the 8th sentence you spelt /fortunately/ wrong.

    -In your 8th sentence when you fix the spelling of /fortunately / put a comma in front and behind.
    - also indent
    - also double space.

    overall nice story.

    ReplyDelete
  2. 100wcbyfread.com20 January 2017 at 16:29

    also I think you should ad paragraphs when you start a new though. overall nice story

    ReplyDelete
  3. 100wcbyfread.com20 January 2017 at 16:35

    also in your last sentence you wrote /look/ 2 times.
    Also not contractions in formal writing. and you need to capitalize the first letter when a person speaks. you did it but not for /hurry Michael/

    ReplyDelete
  4. MJ21 January 2017 at 08:20

    Thanks

    ReplyDelete

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